Birthdays, Christmases and Other Holidays
What makes a birthday, Christmas or holiday special is individual – so you will want to find something memorable for you. Here are a few ideas to start you off.
You could choose a theme for the day bringing it into your bedroom and party e.g. Caribbean, pirates, fairies, 60’s or 70’s. Enjoy the preparations!
Presents
Some of the best presents are things that take no energy to use, if you can sit it by you and look at it occasionally when you have the energy then it's perfect for someone of a low percentage. Here are some suggested ideas:-
Things to avoid unless told otherwise.
Also check out...The Do's and Don'ts of buying presents for people who are ill
Food on the Day
BAKED ALASKA
Sponge Base
Italian Meringue
Method
For the Sponge:
For the Meringue:
To Complete:
Alternatively leave the sponge whole and make one large baked Alaska.
Otrher
Some severely affected people may not want any celebration at all. This is up to the individual and they should not be pushed into doing something they don’t want to. This can be very hard for the family, especially if it is Christmas; but try to make the time special for everyone else, away from the severely affected person. Set aside periods to just sit with the severely affected person even if they aren’t taking part in the festivities.
With time they/you will begin to enjoy life again and take part in things the way they used to.
- Build up to the event slowly. Enjoy the preparations and don’t leave things to the last minute.
- Order presents well in advance. Write Christmas cards in stages over the months leading up to December. You could even make your own cards or send e-cards.
- Spread your Christmas and birthday over days or even weeks – make the event last as long as possible, spread out the enjoyment.
- Don’t use a month’s energy in just one day; you’ll regret it later and any good memories will be replaced with bad ones.
- Get other people to help open presents – brothers and sisters love this. Possibly get people to leave them unwrapped. Instead put them in pretty bags or use crepe/tissue paper and ribbons instead of sellotape.
- Spread out opening presents. Don’t try and open them all at once, possibly opening them as they arrive and just leave presents from close family and friends for the actual day. You could have non-wrapped presents in a pretty box or bag and do a lucky dip whenever you feel up to it or are alone and bored.
- Decorate the bedroom/living room with balloons, banners, streamers or anything that sparkles. Helium balloons from florists are good value because they last for a long time. For Christmas get a mini-tree available from garden centres and supermarkets. For a few weeks before you could help make the decorations e.g. paper chains
- Include your friends by having a long distance party. Make up party bags to send out with a candle, a piece of cake or some chocolate, a balloon or some streamers. Alternatively have a spa day, send out face mask packs with a candle and possibly a herbal tea bag.
You could choose a theme for the day bringing it into your bedroom and party e.g. Caribbean, pirates, fairies, 60’s or 70’s. Enjoy the preparations!
- Wear special/new pyjamas/clothes, even if you have to change into them a few days before. Get someone to paint your nails and maybe even wear a necklace or ring on the day.
- Put your cards up around the room.
- Get friends and family to record messages onto a tape if you are too ill for visits.
Presents
Some of the best presents are things that take no energy to use, if you can sit it by you and look at it occasionally when you have the energy then it's perfect for someone of a low percentage. Here are some suggested ideas:-
- Crystal gardens/trees are great to watch and take no energy.
- Pretty ornaments to look at.
- Glow in the dark shapes to stick to the ceiling, walls or put on the floor.
- Mobiles, crystals all look pretty, even in the dark.
- Galileo’s Thermometer.
- Cuddly toys, although sometimes people can get too many. An idea is buying one cuddly toy from somewhere like the Bear Factory www.thebearfactory.co.uk and then buy different outfits to dress the toy in.
- Balloons - from florists or delivered in a box from online retailers
- Pictures, landscapes or scenes are best, looking at people doing things like swimming, walking etc can be upsetting.
- Calendars (this can be a dodgy area as some people don't like to think about time passing; but I enjoyed a new picture each month)
- Audio Books
- E-tokens
- Chocolate a staple of most Severely affected people diets.
- There is a Chocolate Tasting Club where you get sent a new box of chocolates every month or alternate month with new chocolates to try. Available from www.hotelchocolat.com
- Nightshirts, pyjamas, slipper socks
- Pretty blankets.
- Different textured pillows.
- Flowers though choose a non-scented variety if the person has smell sensitivities.
- www.hawkin.com have some great stuff for Severely affected people like touchable bubbles and glow in the dark ducks.
Things to avoid unless told otherwise.
- Smellies, make up, scented products, brushes, mirrors
- DVDs, Videos, Books, Music CDs
- Writing sets, diaries
- Vouchers that have to be used in a shop
- Non-nightime clothes
Also check out...The Do's and Don'ts of buying presents for people who are ill
Food on the Day
- Buy some pretty paper cups, plates and straws for using on the day.
- Choose food you enjoy to eat, even if it is only your favourite chocolate bars or ice cream.
- A fun and easily swallowed cake is a Baked Alaska – ice cream covered with meringue baked in a sponge flan case. Candles can be put in this.
BAKED ALASKA
Sponge Base
- 6 eggs (separated)
- 6 oz (175g) plain flour
- 5 ½ oz (160g) caster sugar
- ½ pot of strawberry jam
- ½ tub of vanilla ice cream
Italian Meringue
- 4 oz (110g) egg whites
- 8 oz (225g) caster sugar
- 2 fl oz (55ml) water
Method
For the Sponge:
- Have a 10 x 12 inch (25cm) tray lined with greaseproof paper. Use a round tin if you want to just make one large cake.
- Place the egg whites into a mixing bowl, whisk until stiff and gradually add sugar. Once all whisked in, add one egg yolk at a time and combine. Once all combined fold in the flour.
- Place the mixture into your prepared tray and spread evenly, bake at 400ºF/220ºC/gas 6 for 10 minutes until springy to touch.
- Once the sponge has cooled, cut out 3½ inch (9cm) rings and place ready on a baking tray with a dessertspoon full of jam in the middle. Alternatively use a slice of bought jam sponge roll or a bought sponge flan case.
For the Meringue:
- Place sugar and water into a thick-bottomed pan over a medium heat. Using a sugar thermometer, take the caramel mixture to 115ºC (soft ball), this is achieved by leaving to boil for about 3 to 4 minutes.
- When the sugar is almost at 110ºC turn on your machine and start to whisk your egg whites, and then pour over the sugar mixture very slowly – little by little. Be very careful, this sugar mixture is very hot and will burn you if spilt.
- Once all combined, the mixture will increase in size. Leave on the machine mixing until cool, about 3 minutes.
- Once cooled, place into a piping bag with a star nozzle. Alternatively use a packet mix of meringue.
To Complete:
- Place a ball of vanilla ice cream onto the jam in the middle, and then cover with meringue from the sponge base to the tip of the ice cream. You need to make sure all the ice cream is covered with meringue and all sealed. Do them in trays of 4 to 6.
- Bake at 210-220c/400-425f/gas 6-7 for 3 to 4 minutes, until golden brown on top. Serve immediately with Crème Anglaise/custard or pouring cream.
Alternatively leave the sponge whole and make one large baked Alaska.
Otrher
- For an ordinary cake use number shaped candles (on sale at Sainsbury’s) so that you do not need to blow out so many candles.
- Bubbles can be blown round the room.
- Indoor sparklers and fireworks can be fun if you can cope with the noise and light. www.talkingtables.co.uk supply sparklers and table rockets. Careful of bedlinen - I had a scary exprience for my 18th!
- Fairy lights in the garden outside the bedroom are pretty.
- Try and do things you enjoy for the day. Don’t try and recreate previous birthdays – do new special things, if possible.
Some severely affected people may not want any celebration at all. This is up to the individual and they should not be pushed into doing something they don’t want to. This can be very hard for the family, especially if it is Christmas; but try to make the time special for everyone else, away from the severely affected person. Set aside periods to just sit with the severely affected person even if they aren’t taking part in the festivities.
With time they/you will begin to enjoy life again and take part in things the way they used to.
Claire Wade. Studio 17659, PO Box 6945, London, W1A 6US
This site is written by someone who is severely affect with ME and is compiled as a result of personal experience and research of other people with ME and their families. It is intended for information and guidance only. It is not intended to replace medical advice. Readers are strongly urged to consult a professional medical practitioner for a proper diagnosis or assessment before trying any of the treatments or medications outlined. As with all medications, always consult your GP, specialist or pharmacist and tell them about other medications or herbal preparations you are already taking; always read the label and patient information leaflet.
The contributors to this website are not medically trained but all live with or have significant experience of ME. The tips may not be suitable for everyone. No responsibility for loss occasioned to any person acting or refraining from action as a result of any statement in this work can be accepted by the author.
No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means (photocopying, electronic, recording or otherwise), except for personal or non-commercial use without the permission of the author.
Claire Wade has asserted her right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act of 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
The contributors to this website are not medically trained but all live with or have significant experience of ME. The tips may not be suitable for everyone. No responsibility for loss occasioned to any person acting or refraining from action as a result of any statement in this work can be accepted by the author.
No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means (photocopying, electronic, recording or otherwise), except for personal or non-commercial use without the permission of the author.
Claire Wade has asserted her right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act of 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.